The Long-Overdue Ed Hardy Rant

Christian Audigier’s Ed Hardy line is literally the worst thing that has ever become a part of the fashion world.  In fact, “Ed Hardy” and “fashion” do not even belong in the same setence. 

Ed Hardy is that train of toilet paper that sticks to the bottom of your new Louboutins in a public restroom.  It’s stuck there, a blight on your fashionable pumps, until you notice that it’s there and remove it. 

So, people, please notice Ed Hardy’s blight on the world of fashion and remove it–stop buying this crap!  If nobody buys it, then it’ll eventually go away.  We’ll be rid of the repulsive snake-skull-heart-flower-printed shirts, sunglasses, bags, scarves, shoes, vodka (yes, vodka–WTF?), and–for those of us in Las Vegas–the Christian Audigier atrocity of a nightclub. 

And, if you happen to be somebody that thinks anything Ed Hardy looks good…well, first, you would be wrong.  And second, you may think you look fashionable all wrapped up in these horrific prints, but nobody else thinks you do.  Well, except the loser standing next to you also wearing Ed Hardy.  But, neither of you are cool.  Whatever you think Ed Hardy is doing for your mojo, it’s not and it never will.  What it’s doing is reminding us of “Jersey Shores,” and who wants to be around any of those people in real life? 

So, again, I implore you to stop buying this junk.  Let Ed Hardy be a thing of the past, a thing that only appears in our darkest nightmares.  Because in daylight, it just looks like a circus barfed all over your chest.

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